CAN TAI CHI HELP ANXIETY? MY PERSONAL JOURNEY
How Tai Chi Helped Me Overcome Panic Attacks and Anxiety
There was a time in my life when I wondered if I would ever feel like myself again.
Today, when people visit Tai Chi Daily, they see someone who has practiced Tai Chi every day for more than three decades. They see encouraging posts about health, mindfulness, and daily practice. What they don't always see is the journey that brought me here.
For years, I struggled with anxiety without even realizing what it was.
Looking back, I can now see that it began around 1990. I would have days where I felt lightheaded, uneasy, or simply "off." I blamed allergies or thought maybe I wasn't feeling well. I had no idea anxiety could create such powerful physical symptoms, so it never crossed my mind that what I was experiencing could be anxiety.
Up until then, many friends had complimented me on my calm demeanor. They would often say, "You're always so grounded." Looking back, it's interesting that even though I appeared calm on the outside, I had no idea what was slowly beginning to happen on the inside.
In 1993, while I was still dealing with those feelings, I enrolled in my first Tai Chi class.
I wasn't looking for a cure.
I simply wanted to learn Tai Chi.
What I didn't realize at the time was that Tai Chi would become one of the greatest tools in my recovery.
Even attending that first class wasn't easy. I remember feeling so lightheaded that it almost seemed like the walls were moving around me. Looking back, I'm amazed that I kept going. It would have been easy to stay home, but something inside me kept telling me to return the following week.
I'm grateful that I did.
A few years later, while vacationing with my family at Walt Disney World, I experienced what I now recognize as my first major panic attack.
My oldest son was about three years old, and I was carrying him in my arms as we walked up the incline toward the entrance of the Magic Kingdom. Suddenly, my equilibrium felt off. Within seconds, I felt an overwhelming wave of panic. My heart began racing, and my thoughts immediately went to my father.
My father had struggled with problems related to his balance for years and believed something was seriously wrong with him. Seeing him go through that when I was young made me fear the same thing was happening to me.
My father was killed in a car accident when I was seventeen, so we never had the chance to understand what he had been living with. Years later, as I learned more about anxiety, I realized many of the symptoms that had frightened him were the very same ones I was experiencing.
I remember getting some water, and within a short time I began feeling better. I continued enjoying the day with my family.
But something had changed.
From that moment on, I worried that the feeling would come back.
At the time, I didn't understand that I had begun sensitizing my nervous system. Every unfamiliar sensation suddenly caught my attention. If I felt lightheaded, I immediately wondered why. If my heart raced, I became concerned. The more attention I gave those feelings, the more frightening they became.
I didn't know it then, but I had become trapped in the same cycle that so many people with anxiety experience.
As time went on, the panic attacks became more frequent until they were part of my daily life.
Simple things that most people take for granted became difficult. Going to a restaurant, shopping in a store, standing in a checkout line, and even going to work sometimes felt overwhelming. Every outing became a mental battle.
Like so many people searching for answers, I turned to the internet.
I spent countless hours reading articles and searching for a natural way to overcome anxiety. Unfortunately, I kept finding websites that promised the answer, only to lead me through pages of marketing before asking me to buy an eBook.
One day, I finally gave in and purchased one for thirty-five dollars.
Looking back, it did help me, but I couldn't help wondering why so many people seemed more interested in selling hope than simply helping those who were suffering.
I promised myself that if I ever found a way through my own anxiety, I would share what I learned freely with others.
That promise is one of the reasons this article exists today.
My Lowest Point
As my anxiety grew worse, panic attacks began happening almost every day.
Two experiences, in particular, have stayed with me.
The first happened while I was out to dinner with my three sons at one of our favorite hibachi restaurants.
We were having a wonderful time when the chef poured alcohol onto the grill and ignited it. Suddenly, flames shot up from the grill.
Without warning, I experienced one of the strongest panic attacks I had ever had.
Until then, most of my panic attacks had been mild enough that I could usually work through them.
This one was different.
I immediately broke out in a sweat, got up from the table, and went into the restroom. I splashed cold water on my face, hoping the feeling would pass.
It didn't.
I returned to the table and did my best to finish my meal, but I was convinced I was about to pass out.
I had to excuse myself again and walk outside.
I sat alone in the car, waiting for the feeling to ease.
A few minutes later, my oldest son came outside to check on me.
My biggest fear was, "What if I feel so badly that I can't drive my boys home?"
I handed him the money for the meal and asked him to pay the bill because I couldn't go back inside.
I was completely embarrassed.
My sons were only fourteen, twelve, and nine years old.
As a father, I wanted to be taking care of them.
Instead, my oldest son was taking care of me.
Once the bill was paid, I felt well enough to drive home, but that moment has stayed with me ever since.
The second experience happened shortly afterward while I was shopping at my local Home Depot.
I was standing in the checkout line, waiting for my turn, when I suddenly felt another panic attack coming on.
As the customer in front of me finished paying, my heart began racing.
My hands started shaking.
I became extremely lightheaded and felt certain I was about to pass out.
The fear became so overwhelming that I simply abandoned my shopping cart and walked out of the store.
After sitting in my car for a few minutes, I convinced myself to go back inside and try again.
Somehow I managed to finish paying, although I was barely holding myself together.
I then drove to pick up my sons.
As a divorced dad, it was my day to be with them, and missing that time was not an option.
I remember sitting in the driveway waiting for them to come outside.
Inside, I was completely panic-stricken.
On the outside, I tried not to let them see it.
I knew I couldn't let them down.
I had to be strong.
That day, I realized anxiety was no longer controlling just my life—it was beginning to affect the people I loved most.
At that point, I knew I couldn't continue living this way.
Choosing a Different Path
A few days later, I made an appointment with my primary care doctor.
After listening to everything I had been experiencing, he told me I had a chemical imbalance and prescribed Xanax along with an antidepressant.
I drove home feeling defeated.
For the first time in my life, I felt like I had lost control of my own mind.
I remember sitting there asking myself,
"I've been practicing Tai Chi and meditating for almost fourteen years. How can I possibly be feeling like this?"
Around that same time, my cousin said something I'll never forget.
"If it wasn't for Tai Chi, you'd probably be lying in a ball on the floor."
At first, I laughed.
But the more I thought about it, the more I realized she was absolutely right.
Even though I was struggling, years of practicing Tai Chi had quietly been building resilience inside me. It had taught me how to relax, breathe, stay present, and keep moving forward one day at a time.
Later that day, I called my cousins, who I am very close with, and told them something that would shape the rest of my recovery.
I said,
"I'm going to do everything in my power to overcome this naturally."
That was simply the path I felt I needed to take.
Looking back, I realize medication may have provided some much-needed relief from the constant anxiety I was experiencing, and I completely understand why many people choose that path with their doctor's guidance.
For me, I wanted to see how much progress I could make naturally before making that decision.
At the same time, I also began seeing a therapist.
That was one of the best decisions I could have made.
Talking openly about what I was experiencing helped me understand that I wasn't alone. More importantly, it helped me realize I wasn't "going crazy." I was experiencing something that millions of people struggle with every day.
I continued practicing Tai Chi.
I meditated.
I read every book on anxiety I could get my hands on—many of them more than once.
Around this time, I discovered the work of Dr. Claire Weekes.
She gave me something I desperately needed—hope.
For the first time, someone explained exactly what was happening inside my body. I wasn't broken. My nervous system had simply become sensitized through repeated fear and adrenaline.
Her famous Four Steps became something I practiced every day.
Face.
Accept.
Float.
Let Time Pass.
I also wrote down a few positive affirmations inspired by Louise Hay and placed them where I would see them every day. Over time, reading and repeating them became part of my daily routine.
One exercise that really opened my eyes was writing down every negative thought I had throughout the day. After a while, I looked at the paper and couldn't believe how many negative thoughts I was feeding myself.
That's when I realized I needed to change the conversation I was having in my own mind.
Whenever a negative thought entered my head, I made a conscious effort to replace it with a positive one.
I also surrounded myself with words of encouragement. Whether they came from books, musicians, or movies, they all carried the same message:
Don't give up.
Those words became a source of strength on the days when I felt discouraged. I saved many of the quotes that inspired me during my recovery and have shared them on my Martial Arts Quotes page. My hope is that one or two of them might encourage you to keep going, just as they encouraged me.
I watched and listened to Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, Bob Proctor, and many others whose messages encouraged me to keep moving forward.
I wasn't looking for a quick fix.
I was looking for lasting change.
Looking back now, I don't believe there was one single thing that helped me recover.
It was the combination of many small daily practices that slowly changed my life.
What Tai Chi Taught Me About Anxiety
Although Tai Chi didn't prevent me from developing anxiety, it gave me something incredibly valuable during my recovery.
It had already taught me how to relax.
One of the greatest lessons came through practicing Push Hands.
Push Hands is a two-person Tai Chi exercise where each person tries to find the other's center of balance. The natural instinct when someone pushes against you is to tense your muscles and resist.
Ironically, that's exactly what makes you easier to uproot.
The more you tense, the easier it becomes for your opponent to take your balance.
The better approach is to stay relaxed, maintain good body alignment, remain grounded, and allow your opponent's force to pass harmlessly through you before returning energy with proper structure and timing.
Years of practicing Push Hands taught me that resisting force only creates more tension.
One day, I realized anxiety worked much the same way.
The physical sensations I feared weren't actually my enemy.
My reaction to them was.
Every time adrenaline surged through my body, I immediately tensed my muscles and became frightened by what I was feeling.
My racing heart.
My shallow breathing.
My dizziness.
My tunnel vision.
The fear that I might pass out.
The more I resisted those feelings, the stronger they seemed to become.
Tai Chi had already taught me a different response.
Instead of fighting the sensations, I began practicing relaxation.
Little by little, I stopped fearing the feelings themselves.
I stopped trying to force them away.
Instead, I allowed them to come and go, just as I would neutralize an incoming push during Push Hands.
That simple change became one of the most important lessons in my recovery.
Learning to Change My Reaction
Instead of avoiding situations that triggered my panic attacks, I gradually placed myself back into them.
It wasn't because I enjoyed feeling uncomfortable.
It was because I knew the only way to teach my nervous system that I was safe was to stop running from the feelings.
Instead of running from the sensations, I learned to experience them without adding more fear.
This wasn't easy.
Some days felt like taking two steps forward and one step back.
But little by little, my nervous system began to settle and heal.
Each successful experience taught my brain that I was safe.
Over time, the panic attacks became less frequent.
Eventually, they stopped altogether.
Other Things That Helped Me
Tai Chi was one important part of my recovery, but it wasn't the only one.
Learning proper breathing techniques helped calm my nervous system during stressful moments.
Using a smartwatch gave me reassurance during panic attacks. When I felt my heart racing, I could look down and see that it wasn't nearly as fast as it felt. Seeing those numbers reminded me that what I was experiencing was anxiety—not a medical emergency.
Educating myself about anxiety removed much of the fear surrounding the symptoms.
Positive affirmations slowly changed the conversations I was having with myself each day.
For a period of time, I also took L-theanine, an amino acid found in green tea. Whether it helped directly or simply gave me additional confidence, I can't say with certainty, but I believe it played a small part in my overall recovery.
None of these things worked overnight.
Together, they became part of my daily practice.
Books That Changed My Life
Several authors had a profound impact on my recovery.
The books that helped me the most were:
Hope and Help for Your Nerves — Dr. Claire Weekes
Peace from Nervous Suffering — Dr. Claire Weekes
From Panic to Power — Lucinda Bassett
One story from Lucinda Bassett's book has stayed with me for years.
She described riding a ski lift and feeling terrified while another woman on the very same ski lift was laughing, smiling, and enjoying every moment.
They were experiencing the exact same ride, yet reacting to it completely differently.
That story helped me realize something important.
It wasn't always the situation that created fear.
It was often the meaning we attached to it.
I also found the work of Dr. Harry Barry incredibly helpful. His books and videos reinforced many of the same principles and gave me additional confidence that recovery was possible.
If you're struggling with anxiety, I highly recommend these resources. You may even be able to borrow them from your local library.
Looking Back
Today, I no longer suffer from panic attacks.
Looking back, I don't believe there was one magic cure.
Recovery came from education.
Daily practice.
Changing my reaction to fear.
Giving my nervous system time to heal.
Being patient with myself.
And refusing to give up.
If there's one thing I learned through all of this, it's that recovery didn't come from finding one magic answer.
It came from showing up every day.
Learning a little more.
Practicing a little more.
Refusing to give up.
Some days I made progress.
Other days I felt like I was right back where I started.
But every small step forward eventually added up to something much bigger than I could have imagined.
If there's one thing I hope you take away from my story, it's this...
I've been where you are.
I know how frightening it can feel.
I know how easy it is to believe you'll never feel like yourself again.
But I also know that recovery is possible.
It may not happen overnight, and everyone's journey is different, but don't lose hope.
Keep learning.
Keep practicing.
Be patient with yourself.
Take one small step at a time.
One day, you'll look back and realize how far you've come.
If sharing my story encourages even one person to keep going, then every word of this article has been worthwhile.
I hope my journey encourages yours.
Your journey, our shared path.™
Medical Disclaimer: The information shared on taichidaily.com is based on my personal experience and is provided for educational purposes only. It is not intended to replace professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have concerns about anxiety or your health, please consult a qualified healthcare professional.
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